People say it all the time. “You have to do the work.”“He’s not doing the work.”“I’ve been doing so much work on myself.” But what is the work? What does it actually mean? I don’t think this is very clear. At least, it wasn’t clear to me.

You’ve probably been called “so nice,” “always reliable,” “a great team player,” or “someone I can always count on.” It feels  like a...